First off, lots of love goes out to everybody that's been reading and commenting. All the feedback I've been receiving on Facebook, MSN, and on the site is overwhelming and extremely humbling.

I don't really know how to start this one, but here we go. So lately I've been thinking about how far I've come and how far I still have to go. The thing is, how would I measure whether or not my life meant anything when I'm sitting there on my deathbed? When I lay there, savouring my last moments on Earth, will there be a ton of people grieving and will I be looking back at my life with a smile? Or will I be alone, regretting my life's path? Part of me wishes for an outpouring of grief when I pass, because in some sense this would mean that I meant something to someone. Although I must admit that this is kind of selfish. But what's the alternative? Nobody giving two fucks about a guy named Said that they once knew but remains exactly that; their past?

What should we strive for? Money? Fame? Love? Respect? Happiness? Everybody wants all of them, but we all know that very few will ever win this lottery. For most of us, there will come a point where we are forced to choose the path we take. For me, it seems like that time is now. I'm sitting here crunching numbers in preparation for my mid-term exams and I'm really questioning why I'm wasting time doing something I clearly do not like. But then I realize that the reason I got into this in the first place is because I thought plunging myself into the corporate world would bring me success.

Older, and much wiser, I look back and think WTF? How could I have thought this would bring me success while I had no idea of what success was? Back then, I thought success was having that big 89th floor office, that villa in the south of Spain and that "oh so beautiful" Bentley ..but at what cost? Sharing that office with people that hate your guts? Vacationing in an empty house, alone? and nobody on the passenger seat of your Bentley?

I need to get my head straight and pick which side I'll be on soon. Remember what they say: The devil doesn't give refunds once you sell your soul to him.

Fistbumps of love,

Chidiboi.